Get rotten and goodbye

This site has always been opened for the public, but I guess I have more and more things to share and rant, to myself. Things that shouldn't be discussed, not even to anyone who's close to me. I need some other means to keep the things going. Definitely not here anymore.

I won't shut down the site, just to keep some memories behind, or simply read my subscriptions from time to time. But apart from that, i suppose no more new blogs, nor protected post will be updated.

Bye people.

Life in Uni

It has been the fourth week already and everything seems to be slightly better now. I am getting used to the way of living in Hall and going to school. Sadly, I become really lazy now. Everyone started doing revision while i am still hea'ing around. Actually I have stuff to revise as well but I just don't feel like studying at Hall. I should really start taking my responsibilities again.

My Hall Groupmates are really enthusiastic about joining the Hall Council. I don't really want to becuase joining HC will mean excessive workload in Hall. And i am not the kind of person that likes to organize activities and have the passion to unite people. I guess it's not really my thing. But yea, when the group you are staying with is so active and eager to participate, I feel strange to step aside.

Yet it is another important decision that I have to make. Joining the HC can definitely change me but the consequences of making such a decision may lead to more bads than goods, if i push myself too much. Let's see....

Flying thought

Seriously, I am desperately in need of putting my focuses on something. I hope this is just a long transitional period that I am having. If not, I don't know what I'm gonna do in the coming 3 years.

"點解你成日咁頹?"

That's what I heard today. I used to defend myself and tried my best to convince the sayer that I am not. Now i think it all depends on how people define that word. Honestly, being really outgoing isn't my thing. I didn't just keep rumbling and rumbling. I really tried before I said that.

Somtimes I just don't feel like I want to talk in front of a group of people. When you guys keep talking and talking about random stuff, I don't know when to cut in and what to say. This is number one, the way how I lack communication skills.

Number two, I am so tired of talking. I hate to think and think and think before i can or be ready to say something. This situation is worse when the group size grows bigger. But when i don't talk, people assume that i am looking down on them. Isn't that the ultimate annoyance on the planet?

In these few days, I could fully understand what it meant by 'overdoing' something. Maybe the doers don't think they overdid it, maybe the general public regard it as a good and necessary way of interaction. I don't see it that way nonetheless. It annoys me very much when I see such act.

Everyone knows University is supposed to be a place where you can expand your network and embrace the diversity. Ironically, I'd rather prefer the old imprisonment of secondary school than the freedom I have been given now.

I am reinforcing my castle while everyone is preparing for the demolition.
My fortress is strong, safe and heavily guarded by soldiers who will never hear my command.

Fatality

There is too much to talk about in this week, which makes me don't wanna type anything. Experienced a lot but the campus is still very new and unfamiliar to me tho I am living in BU.

Alright, I am too sick to type anymore. Fever and cough are killing me. My first illness in the campus.